Thing's I've Learned the Hard Way!
Hey there!! Thanks for stopping by to read today’s blog post and welcome to the family! This post is directed more towards my fellow trainers, but owners alike can relate, I am sure!!
Let me tell you what- I like to learn all my life lessons the hard way! That is something my family always jokes on me for, but it’s true. I feel like there are two kinds of people in this life:
1. Those that make mistakes firsthand
2. Those that learn from people that make mistakes firsthand
Unfortunately, I fall into category one LOL! This blog is going to go over 5 different mistakes I have made that I have learned from or are currently trying to learn from because I am not going to pretend like I am not about to learn more lessons the hard way!
Burning Out Isn’t Worth the $$$!
Honestly most of the time I don’t say yes to too many things because of money. Most of the time it’s because I want to help owners get in faster or don’t want to tell someone no to boarding. However, being overworked and overbooked is not sustainable or fair to yourself in the long run. I cannot tell you how many times I have told my family and friends while I am in the thick of being overbooked that I will NEVER do this to myself again…and I am embarrassed to admit that none of them believe me when I say it because I have done it to myself so many times! I actually have a wave of dogs soon that will put me over the amount I like to have. Luckily, I have trainers now to help me, but still it shouldn’t have been scheduled in that way. Burnout is something I feel like every trainer I have ever spoken with has experienced. If you haven’t, I applaud you and hope you never have to! With the intention of full transparency, I will also say that I am still working on not doing this to myself. When it comes down to it, I have come to terms with taking a pay cut if it means my work/life balance is more even.
Ask Owners Tough Questions!
When I first began training, I would bend and break for my clients, and not in a good way! I think it is absolutely normal to learn what your boundaries are and what you will and won’t allow along the way! However, when I first started training and someone would reach out with a goal for their dog, I would book them WITHOUT asking the touch questions. The reasoning behind not asking those questions was partially because I was scared if I asked them those questions, they wouldn’t book, and also because I didn’t know what questions to ask due to limited experience. I think it’d be helpful to give an example: If I have someone that has a dog that has separation anxiety one of the first questions I now ask is “Are they crate trained”. If the answer is no that’s fine, but my follow up question will be “Is that something you are willing to try to do for training?”. Before this would be something I would be nervous to ask because if they didn’t want to do it, I didn’t want to push them. However, this is something now that I know is SO important to the training and for the dog’s benefit. If I ask that question and they say they are not willing to try that then the answer is simple- we will not be training together. This caused me so many issues when I first started out. I would get into training with an owner that had a cap on what they were willing to try/change about the way they lived their life therefore putting unrealistic expectations on me AND their dog! It is worth it to ask these questions BEFORE you get paid money and before you begin working with someone!
Create Community!
When I first got out of dog training school, I had a small number of trainers that I knew, but none of them were local. It wasn’t until I hired my own trainers on and went to a networking event in Florida that I actually created a community. The first I would say 2 years of training full time I had almost no one I could consistently ask questions to or if I did, I didn’t want to bother the same person with so many questions. Now, my first response to that is ASK THE QUESTIONS! If you have a good group of trainers around you, they are not going to get annoyed at how many questions you have! I cannot even imagine training now without having so many people to talk to about training or bounce ideas off of. I feel like this industry can be very judgmental and isolating if you don’t have a network of people. Once you find who your group of people are though it is amazing to be able to RELATE to them!
Don’t be Afraid to say NO!
When I first started training, I thought every person that came to me with an issue I had to take on and help! On one hand you only get experience by doing it. On the other hand, if you aren’t experienced in it sometimes it can be extremely stressful trying to learn on the spot! There are three things that I will not take on today and will say no to taking on 99% of the time:
1. Severe Separation Anxiety
2. Reactivity where the dog redirects and bites the handler
3. Dog on dog aggression in the same house
I used to think choosing not to take on cases made me look weak. However, now I realize that it’s not about weakness it’s about knowing your capabilities and also attracting the right clients. I don’t know that much about severe separation anxiety and how to break down and work through that, so I choose not to take that on because I need more education. However, reactivity and dog/dog aggression I COULD take on if I wanted to, but I don’t want to and that is ok! There are other trainers locally that I know and trust that love to take that on and I will refer them to those people! It’s ok not to want to take on severe behavior modification- it doesn’t make you any less smart, brave, badass! Once you realize what you like to train really focus on advertising for that because the more behavior modification cases you take on the more you will attract them!
Setting Boundaries With Myself is Hard!
For a lot of people setting boundaries with owners, friends, family, etc. is HARD. Which to that I will say cheers lol because it is. However, for me I actually struggle to set boundaries with myself more than others. I will not take advantage of other people’s time and am overly aware of how they are feeling/respecting work hours. To myself thought that’s a much different story! To myself it’s only one more call past 6pm, one more dog that’s boarding, and one more private lesson even though I feel overwhelmed. I am still currently trying to work on this with myself but have slowly been getting better and better. I respect others so much so why can’t I have that same respect for myself? Great question- I don’t know the answer. I am actively trying to change this though and so should you if you feel like you can relate!